Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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