i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Randomize
