yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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