The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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