She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
