So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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