i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
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