No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize