Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize