god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Randomize