Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
