"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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