who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
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