Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
