with your own penis?
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Randomize