if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
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