He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
