Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
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