chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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