Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
PANTIES FOUND
Randomize
