so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
