What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
Randomize