she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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