it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
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