i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Randomize
