i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
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