I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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