hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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