Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
