dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Randomize
