your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
