i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Randomize
