sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
babies were throwing up all over the place
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
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