so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
