Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize
