Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(727): View more from Florida

What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?

(1-727): View more from Florida

Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.

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(770): View more from Georgia

I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them

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(310): View more from California

I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.

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(757): View more from Virginia

I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk

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(580): View more from Oklahoma

Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.

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(989): View more from Michigan

i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen

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(803): View more from South Carolina

He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees

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(251): View more from Alabama

you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"

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