Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize