Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Randomize
