I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I believe in your delicious
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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