And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Randomize