After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
