Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
The cops high fived after they tackled you
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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