Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
