She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
Randomize
