he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
