Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
You smell like stripper and shame
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize
