i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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