can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
