I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize