are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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